Tag Archives: Purposeful Holidays

PERFECTLY IMPERFECT HOLIDAYS ~creating a meaningful holiday ~

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Focusing on what we most want can help us to create the meaningful, joyful holiday we most desire. It is all about deciding what we most want. Here are a few questions you can ask yourself or your spouse / partner or your family to figure out what feels most meaningful to you. If you are living as a couple or have a family, you might consider doing a family meeting and considering the questions below. And then trying to incorporate what you all most want into your plans.

Note: If you are single or live alone, you can still go through this process to determine what you can create that gives you the most meaningful holiday.

  1. What would your best holiday LOOK LIKE to you or your family?
  2. What would you or your family FEEL LIKE if you were experiencing this meaningful holiday.
  3. What words or phrases DESCRIBE YOUR VISION of a meaningful holiday?

Here are some words / phrases you and your family can choose from as to what you might feel fits for your meaningful holiday. You can add your own words / phrases that describe what most fits for you.

Special Holiday Activities (what specific activities do you want to include)

Spending Time Together (how much time together and how)

Feeling Connected (what would it look like to be connected)

Having Fun (how would you know. you are having fun)

Special Foods (what foods would that be for you)

Religious / Spiritual Activities (what specific things do you want to do or not do in this category)

Special Traditions to Include or New Ones to Start (which ones do you want to see happen)

Down Time / Relaxing / At Home Time (how much would you want to feel balanced & feel good among so much going on during the holidays)

Consider Including the following as you plan this purpose driven holiday:

BE realistic, giving time to breathe and create space in between to really enjoy what you do choose to do.

BE flexible, allowing imperfections and interruption of plans.

BE who you are with doing what means the most to you, remembering you do not have to be perfect!

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Special Note: This article is not intended as therapy. This is a psycho-educational article.

CONTACT INFORMATION :

Tanna K, Strom, LMFT, LPC-S, RPT-S

Virtual Therapy for Oklahoma

Licensed Marital & Family Therapist

Licensed Professional Counselor / Supervisor

Registered Play Therapist / Supervisor

Certified Clinical EFT Practitioner (aka “tapping” for anyone in the USA)

tanna@stromtherapy.com

918- 749-1550

How to Create What YOU Really Want for the Holidays Ahead

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happy-holidays-with-snow-and-penquin

I cannot believe I am writing a blog post on this, but it has already began – the thinking, the obsessing, the worrying, the planning, the stressing about the holidays ahead. The four upcoming holidays can feel like they all merge together into one massive overwhelm. It can be hard to separate them out. But of course it does not have to be that way. I want to share some ideas on creating holidays that are truly what YOU want. And now is the time to contemplate all of this – at the beginning of this time frame.

It is so easy to get caught up in it all and end up doing things you may not really want to do. Or to sometimes not really plan and end up not doing what you really want to do with your holiday time. So here are some ideas to consider.

 Questions you might ask yourself about the upcoming holidays that may help you be the true “creator” of  YOUR  holidays:

  1. What would my perfect holiday times look like? What would I be doing? Who would I be with? Ex. – For some it may mean enjoying time with loved ones. or slowing down to enjoy a special what ever it might be.
  2. What does each holiday really mean to me? Or what do I want it to mean to me? Ex. –  One family may say it is a time to reflect on what we are really thankful for?
  3. Does what I do reflect what I want my holiday to look like and be about? Ex. – Yes and No. Maybe yes we spend time together. But no there is too much competition with iPhones, video games, etc.
  4. What are my most favorite memories of past holidays? What was I doing? Ex.- One child may say when we had the snow ball fight in the front yard. Dad may say, when we went out looking at holiday lights and had hot chocolate after. Mom may say when we all made a holiday meal together.
  5. What are my most un-favorite memories and what can I do to avoid these from happening again? Ex. – This might be for some – the stressing and rushing and overwhelm.
  6. Do my holidays all merge together without a real feel of truly enjoying each one for what they are? A very good question, are we really mindfully enjoying each holiday?

Develop a Flexible Plan That Fits You and Your Family

  • Meet together as a couple or a family to talk about some of the above questions.
  • Decide together (or for yourself if you are single) what your main goals for the holiday are. Is it to relax? To be with family? Enjoy special holiday activities? Celebrate a particular religious belief? A mix?
  • As a couple or family you can put together a flexible plan of the kinds of things you want to do and begin gradually to work toward this.  Incorporating everyone’s ideas is very important if you are in a family or as a couple.
  • Keep in mind that too much will feel overwhelming for most people and that thoughtful choices are a much better route to go. It is not so much about how much you can pack in, but incorporating what you most want to do and really taking time to ENJOY it.
  • Try to stay open and flexible as plans shift and change as they will at times. Knowing you can be happy even if things do not happen exactly as planned.

My hope for you and your family is that you create what you most want and desire. Happy Holidays to you and your family!  holly-leaf-small

Professional Disclosure: This blog is offered as educational information and is not offered as professional therapeutic services. This is not intended to serve as treatment. For professional help contact your local mental health professional. Strom Individual and Family Therapy is not liable for any action or non action you take in regard to this article.