Tag Archives: Positive Thinking

“Letting in the Good” Even When Things Are Not Going As Planned

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The Brown Couch at the Airport

We had just started our vacation and so happy about this time off to re-coop and spend some time with each other as a family.  As we were walking toward our gate at the airport we got a text from our airlines saying there was going to be a 3 hour delay. Not the way we envisioned the start of our trip. We were exhausted from a very busy week and the rush to get off and frankly it was a bit of a bummer.

I was thinking to myself “I really just need to lay down for a bit.” Had been planning on trying to sleep on the plane, which actually normally does not work out too well for me. But that was the plan. We went no more than around the corner and my husband spotted a brown leather couch straight ahead in a quiet spot away from the gate areas. A little closed coffee shop “oasis”. Perfect! We settled in. Of course I got the recline position with my husband being a wonderful pillow to lay up against. As I lay there I started thinking maybe this is what I needed – a place to lay down and rest as I probably would not have been able to really rest on the plane. We talked and were together in this unexpected time & place. It was actually really nice to cuddle up for a bit and catch up, without any pressing agenda. And take a little cat nap, feeling all safe and cozy up next to my husband in a quiet area.

As I truly let go and relaxed, I started noticing small things around me, a woman who was traveling with her little dog and it being given its own special water in a little bowl. The sweet little puppy dog prancing and excited about his water break. The lovely Indian Sculpture that was close to where we sat, had the late day sunlight streaming in across its features, creating a halo around it.

Right before we boarded our plane 3 hours later we were told that due to lateness and delay, we would need to spend the night in Seattle opposed to traveling on to our destination. Not in the plan. My first reaction, was “Another delay! What is going on here?” Well what was going on was a mechanical problem. I came to the decision to be grateful for not being on a plane that may have a safety issue and getting an unplanned bonus day trip into Seattle. We had at one point thought about doing this, so we ended up getting our original wish after all. So we boarded and I got out my favorite peppermint tea and enjoyed the night lights from above. Don’t see those everyday.

The “good stuff” is all around us, even when it does not come on our time-table or in the package we might envision it in. Or unfold in the way we planned.  We just have to be open to seeing the good and letting it into our very imperfect, human lives.  

 

Tanna at Fairbanks Botaninal Garden August 2017 off the path by some blue flowers

 

Here I am a little bit off the path checking out some of the beautiful flowers around me on my  vacation.  Was it a “perfect vacation”. No. More delays on the way back, but you know we had lots of “good things” to happen. Some of those unexpected and just as powerful as the planned ones. Here is to stepping off the path and making your own happiness in whatever the circumstances.   

 

Professional Disclosure: This blog is offered as educational information and is not offered as professional therapeutic services. This is not intended to serve as treatment. For professional help contact your local mental health professional. Strom Individual and Family Therapy is not liable for any action or non action you take in regard to this article.

 

Five Ways to Create the POSITIVE Person YOU Want to Be

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sunshine riverparks

Do you want to feel positive with a sense of well-being? Most of us do. It makes sense to want to feel lighter and calmer. Others will like you better when you are showing this side of yourself. They will find they feel positive and uplifted as well. It is such a lovely chain reaction.  So how do we get to this “happy place”?

Here are Five Basics for Creating the POSITIVE Person YOU Want to Be.

1. Be Mindful of Your “Thought Life”

One way to start the process of becoming a more positive person is to listen to what you are saying to yourself and to others around you. How positive is your thought life? Of course no one is positive all the time.  We are all human and we will have upsets. But this is really the first step in assessing where you are in your path to becoming a more positive person. So make a point to really hear yourself. Are your thoughts and feelings what you want?

2.  Stress Less – It’s All in Perception

When we are stressed, we open our self for negativity to set in. It is hard not to be negative when we feel overwhelmed or that it is just all too much. So finding ways to lower your stress level is a foundation piece. Many times it is our perception of how we view what is going on around us that makes a situation stressful. If things do not go the way you planned, it is normal to feel frustrated and lean toward feeling negative. But if you can stop and know it is all ok. It will all fall in place. Maybe just not in the way you planned. It will feel better.  If we expect perfection from ourselves or others this too will cause upset. As we all know none of us are perfect and we all do the best we can. Be kind to yourself and others. Trying to remember what is really important in the grander scheme of things can help.  When we remember that we can choose our feeling state and our reaction to something, it is very freeing and allows us to move in a confident, positive manner.

3.   Acknowledge Your Upset Feelings and Move to a Higher Positive Feeling

So now you are really hearing yourself. And you can hear the negative talk you do not like or does not make you feel good. Tuning into how you feel is an excellent guide to letting you know if  you need to regroup and go down another path. When we feel good, we are normally on the path to being the positive person we want to be. So if you are feeling badly, no need to deny it. It is good to be in touch with your core feelings. Sometimes that means you will be sad or mad or anxious. It’s ok. After recognizing and acknowledging your upset feelings, you can move on to a higher, better feeling state. It is a choice you can make. You can let go of your upset and move on.  For example: You wake up and you are feeling overwhelmed. You might say to yourself. “It is all too much. I just can’t do it.” You might acknowledge to yourself your core upset and then do a shift, “Yes I am feeling a bit overwhelmed, but I know all will fall into place. I will do the most important things first. It will all be ok.”

4.  Create an Environment that Helps You to Be Positive

Fill your self with what is positive. Things to consider are: what you are watching on tv and the internet, what you are reading, what and who you are listening to. What we surround ourselves with makes a difference. So hang with happy, positive people, watch uplifting shows and programs, read inspirational materials. It all becomes a part of you!

5.  Focus on “The Good”

On purpose focus on what is going well, what you are looking forward to, who is bringing joy in your life.  Absorb and let all that good soak in and let it be a part of you. Some concrete things that you find helpful are: Keeping a Gratitude Journal, Writing, Speaking or Listening to Positive Affirmations, Meditation. Create a “Grateful Mindset” as this will keep you focused on all that is good in your life.

Becoming more positive is a journey. The goal is not to ignore upset feelings. But to come to a place where you honor those upset feelings and then choose to let them go and move on to a higher, better place where more calmness and feelings of well-being can prevail. Best wishes on your journey!

 

BEING POSITIVE GROWS MORE POSITIVE