How to Decide How to Spend Your Time Together

Posted on by

0

Everyone’s time is limited and we all want to make the most of our time together. As a family or as a couple we want to really have time to “be with” each other enjoying each other and the specific activities we choose to do together.

peps

The dynamics on how to decide how to spend time together as a couple or as a family are more similar than you might think. Below are some things to consider as you try to decide what to do with the time you have to spend together either as a couple or as a family.

 1. Consider everyone’s interests and things they like to do. This may or may not be completely evident. If not, this could be a good family meeting discussion or a good couple discussion.

2. Consider how you decide what the family or the couple does together. Many families and couples find that taking turns can feel  fair and can help to eliminate some one from feeling like they never get to do what they enjoy or from feeling like they are being drug from one thing to another. This can also mean everyone has to build up some tolerance in being involved in an activity that is not their first choice. But participating in an activity that another family member feels passionate about can be very connecting and supportive. Remembering everyone will have “their time to choose” can help.

Choosing activities collaboratively in which you try to find something that everyone has some interest in can be a respectful way to honor each other’s time.

Communicating about “how to decide” can be a good activity in itself. You can decide what fits best for you and your partner or your family.

3. Consider the developmental level of children,  if this is a family activity. Is their attention span a match for the activity?  Is their activity level a match for the activity? Is it their best part of the day to participate in an activity outside of the home? Is the length of the activity right for the children?

 4. Consider if this is a couple’s activity, will we be able to communicate and spend one on one time with each other with this activity? Of course at times you may want to be involved in an activity that is a performance or activity that is not particularly interactive. Including time after to talk about and connect can be helpful in these kinds of activities.

 5. Consider the amount of time you have to do an activity together?  Choosing something that fits can make the time together more enjoyable. Feeling rushed can very much dampen your time together. On the other hand, planning a short activity is much better than not doing things together. Short bursts of time together can help you stay connected.

 6. Consider your energy level? Do you want something relaxing? Or do you want something stimulating? Or are you in the mood to learn something new? Do you want to stay close to home or venture out-of-town? Or would you just like to stay home and do something together as a couple or as a family? All things to think about.

Best wishes in choosing what is best for you and your partner or family!

mom daug 

Red Bud Valley Nature Walk

Posted on by

0

tanna's new camera 2010 130

Red Bud Valley

I saw the first red bud trees beginning to blossom last week. And I thought . . .  I know what I am going to recommend as a couple activity for this coming week.  Last year I had an opportunity to experience RED BUD VALLEY for the first time. It was much more of a hike than I thought it would be. This year I took the other trail and found it more level and possibly better for those not used to hiking.  Regardless of which trail you take, you will be able to experience four different eco systems. Spending time in a nature preserve with your honey is close to heaven. Just glorious nature and you and your loved one. No hurry, no distractions.  Just remember to turn your cells on silence, so you can really be with your partner in this special place.  Nature has a calming influence on us so it makes for a good place to connect and just “be” with each other.  I would suggest you allow at least 2 hours if you want to stop and really experience the preserve at a leisurely pace. The next week or two the area will have the red buds in boom. I might note red buds are not particularly prolific in the preserve, but the lands around the area.  But regardless of redbuds or not, it is a lovely area to explore with your partner.

I would suggest that you look at their website before you make the trip. Redbud Valley is managed by the Oxley Nature Center, but not at the same location. Red Bud Valley is roughly 3.5 miles north of 1-44 on 161st E. Ave. in the Catoosa area. More detailed directions are on their website www.oxleynaturecenter.org/redbud.htm . For general information you can call 918-669-6644.  According to their website they are open Wednesday – Sunday from 8:00 – 5:00 pm. The visitor center is open from 11:00 – 3:00. They are closed on holidays. NO ENTRANCE FEE. This could also be a family activity, but I would not recommend this for preschoolers or very young elementary children due to the nature of the trails.  Here is to a lovely walk in nature with your honey!

photo-1

photo-2

Philbrook Second Saturdays – Family Hands On Art Projects for All Ages – FREE

Posted on by

0

SecondSaturdayGroupShotWeb

I have always thought highly of Philbrook Art Museum and the programs they offer for the community. I got a recent email from them as a member about some of the upcoming programs. This is one they highlighted and one that I was not aware of. I called and visited with the Education Department and found that this is a program that has been offered for a couple of years and at this point is FREE to the public. ONEOK, Inc sponsors this program. You do not need to be a member of Philbrook. It is offered on the 2nd Saturday of each month.  I would suggest looking on the Philbrook website www.philbrook.org and click on the tab LEARN at the of the screen to get more information on this program and make sure it is still scheduled . Of course you can get information on other programs offered for families and their children at this link also. My understanding is that this program is open from 10:00 am – 4:00 pm and is come and go and is for all ages. Family friendly art activities, tours and scavenger hunts are possible activities on these Second Saturday events.

This is a wonderful opportunity to explore together fun creative art projects and to expose your children to Philbrook.  Art is so very therapeutic and a wonderful way to connect.   I might also note that the garden trails behind Philbrook are a fun treat for all ages. Enjoy this creative time with your family!

Special Note:  The trails behind the Philbrook are lovely and could also make a lovely Couples Activity. Plus, Philbrook’s restaurant overlooks the gardens and would be a nice special treat. I was told that Philbrook has some free entrance days. So check it out on their website. 

SecondSatMother&SonWeb

SecondSatFatherDaughterWeb

photos from The Philbrook Museum of Art

Setting Time to Connect

Posted on by

0

Hands

One of the basics for creating a healthy relationship, whether it is a couple relationship or a parent / child relationship is to purposefully set time to connect and be with each other. This is so simple but so powerful.  Our “focus and attention” is like water to flowers that bloom and grow. Where we put our time and effort is what will grow and flourish. With our busy lives, for many this means scheduling this time in our calendars. It may also mean setting up regular date nights or family time that is considered priority and not changed unless there is a situation that must be attended too.  The rewards are many for these efforts.  Here is to taking time to create meaningful, healthy relationships! You and your family are worth it.