Three Must Do Things to “Connect and Rejuvenate” on Your SPRING BREAK

Posted on March 13, 2014 by Tanna Strom

Many of you are getting ready to take spring break trips or take off time to be with your children during this official “time off” for your children. Some of you may not be able to take off official time, but plan to do a few special things with your children during this time frame. Regardless, we all want to make the best of this precious time we have with our families.

Here are three “Must Do Things” to “Connect & Rejuvenate” on your Spring Break.

1. Put some “OFF TIME” in your Spring Break. We are all so “ON” all of the time that our bodies need so badly to stop and recuperate. Yes we want to do some special, fun activities with our children. And this is important. But, remember to consider your pacing of activities so you don’t feel like you are running a race, but have time to relax and enjoy with pleasure each activity you put in place. Some like to alternate more active and more quite activities. Of course, the age of your children will make a difference. This “OFF TIME” allows you the space to really connect.

2. “BE WITH” your loved ones. This is more that doing an activity with your family. It is really focusing on and giving your full attention to your children and your spouse. This involves listening, reflecting and sharing thoughtfully – true communication.

3. Include some “TECHNOLOGY FREE TIME” in your plans. Of course we cannot chuck our iPhones for a full week, but we can take breaks from our technology. This includes our cell phones, our i pads, our lap tops, our face book accounts, our tweeting, our emailing, etc., etc. We can choose not to allow these items for ourselves as adults and for our children for certain activities or time periods.

These simple three items can increase your chances of connecting and rejuvenating during spring break regardless of your plans.

Remember spring break is . . .

a “break” from being in ON mode and a time for rest & relaxation
a “break” from your work and a time for your family
A” break” from your technology and a time for personal one on one with your family

Happy Spring Break to you all. Enjoy these precious moments with your loved ones!

Can I Have This Dance?

Posted on March 7, 2014 by Tanna Strom

Want to keep connected? Consider dancing. This activity is one in which we move our bodies in rhythm with each other, connecting physically as well as emotionally. It feels so good to move in time together. You may be thinking, well . . . I don’t know how to dance. So this won’t work for me. There is an answer, Dance Lessons.

Why you might want to consider Dance Lessons?

It is an activity that you both can do together.
It is an activity in which you are engaging fully with each other.
It is a message to each other that you want to be up close and personal with your partner or spouse.
It feels good to accomplish a new skill together.
It is fun!

Some things to consider as a “beginner”

Keep in mind that everyone starts at some point in their history not knowing anything. So it is ok not to know what you are doing. None of us do in the beginning.
Consider a variety of options: Community Education Intro Classes through the Public Schools, Group or Individual Lessons at a Private Dance Studio or by a Private Dance Instructor.
Find an instructor that is positive and a fit for you.
Start with one kind of dance and get comfortable with it before starting with more.
The more you practice the better you get. On the other hand if you can only devote to one class a week, enjoy the time you do have.
Have fun with this. Laugh at your mistakes and keep it light. And keep on going. No one cares about your mistakes.
Know that it will take time to learn to dance. It is a process, so enjoy the journey.

As someone who has worn beginner’s dance shoes, I would just say “Hang In There”. It feels so good as things begin to click into place and you begin to feel you can really dance.

Hope you will consider this wonderful couple’s activity. You are never too old to learn. It is well worth your time and energy!

Tulsa Children’s Museum – Creating Playful Family Connections

Posted on February 27, 2014 by Tanna Strom

Looking for a playful, connecting family activity? Try a Children’s Museum. Tulsa has it’s very own museum for families with young children to middle school age children. Tulsa Children’s Museum Discovery Lab has interactive exhibits for active play and engagement. The three main current exhibits are:

Tulsa Tape & Tunnels – a 30 foot slide and bridge made from packing tape

Make Shop – creating activities that explore sound, electricity, robots, etc. These activities change weekly.

Toddler Area – active play and exploration for babies and toddlers / young children.

Tulsa Children’s Museum Discovery Lab

560 North Maybelle, Tulsa OK (in Owen Park, northwest of downtown)

Monday – Saturday 9:30 am – 5:00 pm

Sundays 11:30 am – 5:00 pm

$5.00 Admission ( Under 2 Free)

Contact Number: 918-295-8144

Website: www.tulsachildrensmuseum.org

The museum exhibits are changed out 2-3 times a year. There are three main areas in one large room. In addition, classes are offered for children 1st grade – 6th grade. Check out their website for current listings. Spring break classes are currently listed.

Tulsa Children’s Museum promotes the program STEM, which promotes Science, Technology, Engineering and Math. And is partnered with the RECESS program which provides Health & Wellness Programs.

This is a wonderful Tulsa treasure and has such wonderful opportunities to play and connect with each other as a family; plus learn and grow. It is all win – win. So if you have not discovered this Tulsa gem, give it a try! Your children will love you for it.

Note: If you do not live in Tulsa, check out your own community for a Children’s Museum.

Laughing Your Way to a Better Relationship

Posted on February 20, 2014 by Tanna Strom

How can fun, laughter, and playfulness create a better relationship? First of all this trio of “feel good” can translate to a “feel good relationship”.

Don’t we all want to laugh and feel light-hearted? Of course we do! We just have to make the effort and take the time to set the environment to do so. Here are a few tips to LAUGH YOUR WAY TO A BETTER RELATIONSHIP:

1. First of all take a trip down memory lane and remember how good it feels to laugh and be playful, shedding the serious business of making a living, being a good parent, buying groceries, etc. This is not to say that these things cannot bring joy also. They can. BUT . . . when we are feeling free from worry and stress, we can feel so much more joy and happiness. So why not let it be with our loved one.

2. Make fun, laughter, and playfulness a priority. Schedule it in. Make it happen. Because it can make YOU feel better and in turn help YOUR RELATIONSHIP to feel alive and well.

3. Plan specifically for “down time” with your significant other or spouse, including playful, fun time. This will look different for different couples. If you don’t know what this might look like, then brainstorm to come up with some things you both could potentially enjoy that is light and playful. This could range from going to a funny movie together to going to the zoo to playing miniature golf to playing a game of your choosing, etc.

4. If you have very little time to “make this playfulness a part of your life” then consider some ONE MINUTE bursts of laughter and playfulness. HOW IS THAT you say. Well . . . here are a few ideas:

Laugh at yourself when you “mess up” and share the funny “mess up” with your loved one., creating an atmosphere of lightheartedness.
Create a fun and playful greeting ritual.(maybe a hip bump or pinky hug or whatever you can come up with)
Show your Good MOOD, with bursts of silly, playful behavior. For example: Instead of quick kiss hello, you do an exaggerated row of 5 or 6 kisses. Your good mood will very likely rub off on your partner.
Tell of something funny or humorous that happened at work or home. It may be something as simple as your pet’s antics.
Playful teasing and bantering can create connection. We just want to make sure the teasing is fun and light, with no sensitive, potential hurtful interaction. We are talking “flirting”.

5. Visualize and create an intention that you will be happy and full of joy and will share that feeling with your sweetheart. As I like to say, “You Get What You Think.”

These breaks of playfulness and fun can create a strong connection. These times create an oasis from the sometimes difficult challenges we deal with on a day-to-day basis.

So I hope you will get busy . . Laughing Your Way to a Better Relationship!

“Weekly Jar of Blessings” to Remind of All That is GOOD in Our Relationship

Posted on February 14, 2014 by Tanna Strom

Want to focus on the good in your relationship? It is so easy to get stuck in the “negative”. So for many of us finding concrete ways to do this is helpful. The more we focus on the GOOD the more we get of it. It is the basic law of attraction.

One activity that you might consider is to create a Weekly Jar of Blessings. This can be used as a Couple or as a Parent / Child Activity. I would think that mid elementary children could participate easily in this activity.

1. Use a pretty jar or container to place what you feel are your “relationship blessings” as they occur during the week.

2. Simply write down on a piece of paper what you appreciate that your spouse or partner (or child) has done that you feel like is a blessing (this may be phrased as a compliment or acknowledgment of something that you appreciated)

OR write down something you have done together that you enjoyed.

Note: Do this as it occurs each day or as soon as you can so you can remember these special things you are doing for each other or have chosen to do together to keep your relationship strong and healthy.

Some examples of Appreciation:

FOR COUPLES “Thank you _____________ for taking time to make me my favorite Italian meal. It hit the spot and was comforting on what was otherwise a hard day.” OR “Thank you _________________ for listening to me when I was so upset about the phone call from the school.”

FOR PARENTS AND CHILDREN OR TEENS “Thank you _________ for helping to clean the house today. It was such a big help.” Dad OR “Thank you ____________ for taking time to tell me about what was going on at school today. I love to hear about what your day is like.” Mom

Some examples of Acknowledging What You are Doing as a COUPLE or PARENT / CHILD OR TEEN to Stay Connected:

FOR COUPLES ” ___________ I was so excited we took the time to have a date night tonight. These times out mean a lot to me.” OR “____________I love how we cooked our supper together tonight. It gave us extra time to talk and be with each other.” OR “___________Having some grownup talk after the kids were in bed last night felt so nice.”

FOR PARENTS AND CHILDREN OR TEENS ” ___________, I am so glad we all went to the park today. It was so much fun hanging out together. Mom” OR ” ______________, I love reading books with you before we go to bed at night.” Dad

Note: Signing and dating your notes can add a layer of meaningfulness if you want to look back at your notes later.

3. Place your Weekly Jar of Blessings in a Prominent Place. This can be a nice reminder that GOOD things are happening!

4. Take time at the end of the week to take a look together at what you did that mattered and what each of you appreciated about the other. If you are doing a parent / child or family jar of blessings, you will want to make sure you have been fairly even as to your compliments or comments to the different children in your family.

5. Empty your jar of weekly blessings into a larger container or box, etc that will hold a large amount (maybe for the year or whatever you feel makes sense) and then store these away. You can label your box with a label “Weekly Blessings – February 2014 to February 2015”.

6. Then start your weekly blessing jar again for the next week.

This is a lovely way to really appreciate each other and find out what helps you to stay connected. When we write something it seems to create a deeper memory and have a more lasting effect. So even though this may mean a bit of effort it is so worth it!

You may find your own version of this Weekly Jar of Blessings. Do what fits for you. It may mean an abbreviated version of what is outlined above. Here are to many voiced words of appreciation and acknowledgments of all the GOOD that is going on in your relationship.

Note: I would like to give credit to Jennifer Grace for the foundation idea of using a jar to collect good feelings.

What Your Loved One REALLY wants for Valentines Day

Posted on February 7, 2014 by Tanna Strom

What does your loved ones REALLY want for Valentine’s Day? They want “YOU” in the purest sense. They want your focus and attention and love! I have listed some ideas on how you can accomplish this. These general ideas can be for a spouse, partner, significant other or your child.

How to show your loved one that YOU are there for them on Valentine’s day?

1. Planning ahead can mean so much in showing your loved ones that you matter to them. We plan for work, for our activities outside of work, etc. So planning for our loved ones who are a high priority for us makes sense. It is a message of “YOU are important to me!”

2. Setting up time to BE WITH your loved one. This means physically and emotionally. If for whatever the reason if it can not be on “the day”, then make sure you plan an alternate day that you designate as your special time together. Having time together shows your commitment to them.

3. Communicate and plan jointly as to what you will be doing. As you plan what you will do really talk to each other about what is a good fit as to interest and enjoyability. All shows your true intent to give a gift of time and interest in pleasing the other.

4. To Gift or Not to Gift? Valentine’s gifts for some are important and others not so much. Know your loved one. A gift of a special experience or activity may be just the ticket. Others may enjoy a more traditional gift – flowers, jewelry, chocolates, etc. Even with a traditional gift, making it to fit uniquely makes it extra special. If you know your sweetheart loves a particular color or kind of something, choose that of course. A coupon book of “Things You Will Do” for your Loved One can be fun. A special “hand made” card for your honey can hit the mark for many. Or a special home cooked meal of their very favorite foods can be a treat for some. It is your thought and use of your knowledge of your loved one that really counts. Not so much the cost of something.

5. Consider doing Valentine’s Day more than one time a year. All of the things we try to do for Valentine’s Day can be things we do on a regular basis. This is what our loved ones want to feel connected and special – FOCUS, ATTENTION, and LOVE!

Jenks Family Indoor Swim, Jenks Planetarium Shows . . . Fun for All in the Tulsa Area

Posted on February 1, 2014 by Tanna Strom

Looking for some “Family Fun”. Check out Jenks OK Community Ed Programs. Two fun programs that I would like to highlight here are their Family Fun Swim and the Jenks Planetarium Shows. You do not have to live in Jenks, OK to attend their community education events. You do have to pay 1% more than a Jenks school resident, but the fees are so very reasonable that this really does not add up to much. So check it out.

JENKS FAMILY FUN SWIM

I was so pleased to hear that the Jenks Aquatic Center is available to the public at scheduled times. This pool is on the Jenks High School Campus. One of the special programs is the Family Fun Swim. This is an open swim for parents and their children. Minimum pool depth is 3.5 feet and temp is 82-84 degrees. This is an indoor pool. Lap lanes are available in the Competition Pool. Times available for swimming are: Fridays 6:00-7:30 pm and Saturdays 10:00 am – 2:00 pm. Fees are $5. per sessopm for Jenks adult school district residents and $5.25 for non Jenks school district residents adults and then $3.00 for children who are Jenks school district residents and $3.15 for children who are non Jenks school district residents. Sign up for this program is through Jenks Community Ed.

JENKS PLANETARIUM SHOWS

The Jenks Planetarium is housed in the new Math and Science Building on the Jenks Central Campus. This planetarium is on the 3rd floor. It is 50 foot, 120 seat SciDome high-definition planetarium. When I called to check on ages for this new facility I was told it is for all ages – children, teens and adults. They host regular shows. Some of the upcoming shows are:

The Winter Sky (Ages 8 and up) 2-6-14, Thursday, 8:00 – 9:00 pm $5.00

Spaceship T.A.T.U.M (Ages 3 and up) 2-13-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

Astrology : A Story of You (Ages 14 and up) 2-27-14, Thursday, 7:00 -8:00 pm $5.00

The Sistine Chapel (Ages 14 and up) 3-25-14, Tuesday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

Earth, Moon and Sun (Ages 3 and up) 3-27-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

How to Use My Telescope (Ages 8 and up) 4–3-14, Thursday, 8:00 – 9:00 pm $5.00

Animals of the Sky (Ages 3 and up) 4-10-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

Oasis in Space (Ages 14 and up) 4-24-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

Spaceship T.A.T.U.M. (Ages 3 and up) 5-1-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

The Spring Sky (Ages 8 and up) 5-8-14, Thursday, 8:00 – 9:00 pm $5.00

Astrology: A Story of You (Ages 14 and up) 5-22-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

Earth Moon and Sun (Ages 3 and up) 5-29-14, Thursday, 7:00 – 8:00 pm $5.00

You must enroll through Jenks Community Ed in advance to have access to these special showings. Seating is limited. A detailed description of each of the programs is in their catalog on their website.

Contact Information for Jenks Community Ed:

918-298-0340 Office hours are: 7:30 am – 4:00 pm

www.jenkscommunityed.com

You can enroll by phone or via their website.

Note: Finding quality fun family activities can sometimes feel challenging. These two activities are sure to delight your children and offer an opportunity to build your relationship with these fun, healthy and educational events. I might also note that most school districts offer community education classes. So check your own chlld’s school or surrounding schools in your area for other possible family activities.

I might also note the planetarium may be a fun COUPLE ACTIVITY if you are interested in space and astrology. I was told by the Jenks Community Office, the planetarium is geared for all ages.

Woody Guthrie Center – Downtown Tulsa Activity for Families or Couples

Posted on January 20, 2014 by Tanna Strom

The Woody Guthrie Center in Downtown Tulsa would be a lovely winter’s day activity for families or for couples. It is dedicated to the life and legacy of American folk musician and singer-songwriter Woody Guthrie. This interactive museum is appropriate for mid elementary children and up. The center includes:

The Dust Bowl Section featuring the viewing of a film on the dust bowl as you listen to some of Woody’s Dust Bowl Ballads. (This was one of my favorite areas. Watching what the dust bowl was like was pretty fascinating.)
Music Bar for listening to Woody’s music.
Lyric writing station where you can have a hand at creating a lyric.
Woody’s America interactive map to learn about Woody’s history.
Woody’s Footsteps Exhibit.
Woody’s Lyric Journal.
Woody’s violin, guitar and mandolin.
Original, hand written lyrics of “This Land is Your Land”.
Woody Guthrie Archives and Research Area
Special Exhibit Gallery

Woody Guthrie Center

102 E M.B. Brady Street, Tulsa, OK 74103

918-574-2710

HOURS:

Tuesday – Sunday 10:00 am – 6:00 pm

First Fridays: Open til 9:00 pm

Closed on Mondays

www.woodyguthriecenter.org

This would be an especially fun trip for any family or couple who like music. And of course if you like Woody Guthrie, you will definitely love this museum!

Reading Together – A Couple or Parent / Child Activity to Connect Intellectually and Emotionally

Posted on January 11, 2014 by Tanna Strom

Reading together is a wonderful way to connect with your loved ones, whether it is with a child, a significant other or a spouse. In our high-tech age, we don’t always think of this kind of activity. On a winter’s day or evening it can be great when outdoor activities are not possible. Or when it is raining or really for any time that you need to slow down a bit. It is a way to add interest and new things to consider and discuss with one another. Basically a way to connect intellectually and emotionally, a double win! Below I have shared some possible variations of how “reading together” might be done.

As a Couple . . .

Consider selecting a book that is of interest to both of you. Buy two copies, one for each of you. Or of course you can share or check it out from the library. Read a chapter and discuss.
Another possibility is to take turns on selection of which book you read together. This is a bit more adventuresome, but it does mix it up a bit and makes both people stretch. You could read a certain amount and then talk about.
You each read your own book but stop at intervals and tell each other what is going on with your book and what you think about it and have a conversation about it.
Instead of a book, you could do an article from a magazine, newspaper, something on-line, etc. Again discussion following.
One of you reads to the other. This is especially nice when one of you is ill. Sometimes this can be spontaneous when one of you finds something of interest that you feel your loved one might find of interest.

As a Family . . .

Drop Everything and Read Time. Some folks call this DEAR time. Everyone can read whatever they like and then after a certain amount of time each person can share a bit of what they were reading. Questions can be asked or discussions can develop. And maybe as you do this you can have a snack together. You can have a regular time you do this as a family or set it up when you feel it is a good fit for your family to do.
Select a book to all read at the same time and to discuss. Maybe one chapter at a time.
Read Aloud Time: Family members take turns picking something to read to their family. This could be a very short story or a poem or a chapter of a book or a quote. This might be done on family night or be done as part of Family Meeting Time. It could be done where only one “read aloud” happens per time or each person does a short read aloud. Discussion can follow.

As a Parent / Child Activity . . .

Let your child choose a book and you take turns reading it together. You can talk about what each of your thoughts are afterwards.
You read to your child. Invitation for discussion afterwards.

Hope you will have lots of cuddle up time soon to do some reading together. You won’t be sorry you did!

A Time to Let Go and a Time of New Intentions for Your Relationships

Posted on December 31, 2013 by Tanna Strom

With the new year, it is an excellent time to consider letting go and creating “New Intentions” for your relationship. What does that mean? It means doing a bit of housekeeping. Out with the old and in with the new. The old being past hurts and misunderstanding and barriers to the relationship that you have with your loved one. The new being a focus on what you want for your relationship and then making a go for it. Can it be that simple? It can. So many times we choose to hang on to things that keep us from being happy.

This is not to say that you should grin and bear it. If you have some issues that need to be addressed with your loved one, then do so in a respectful way, clearing the air and space for new more pleasant feelings to take their place. Search for ways to resolve old, reoccurring conflict with a mutual cooperative look at each of your perspectives with true listening and searching for ways to make things better. It is possible. Letting go of old hurts and unhelpful patterns are the first step to a better relationship. This creates a foundation for creating our intentions of what we really want for our relationship.

I wish for you a wonderful new year filled with relationships that are nurturing and loving, filled with lots of new intentions!

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